Private

The first drop hit my right arm when I was about a quarter of a mile from home, and I thought it was from the southern yellow pine trees over me.  A half mile later a gentle sun shower began and the wind strengthened.  Before long it was a steady rain, but it was such a nice evening that I figured I’d keep walking anyway.  How bad would it get?  After another 15 minutes the sun was reaching out to the horizon behind me, and in front a double rainbow framed part of a fenced-in field.  No one else was around, and so I enjoyed the show in private.  The water dripped from my hair and spotted my glasses; I wouldn’t have seen this if I had been nice and dry at home.  Not bad at all.

At the far edge of the field, probably about 75 yards away, I noticed an unusual optical distortion in front of the trees.  It was in line with the bottom of the right side of the bright rainbow, and it was colored.  The color wasn’t uniform, and I suddenly realized that I was looking at the end of the rainbow.  It was dim; the main part was brighter but appeared to be farther off in the distance and ended at the top of the trees.  My first thought was of Patrick, my Irish friend and colleague.  Alas, there was no pot of gold—only grass and dirt. 

Rainbows happen when raindrops cause a combination of sunlight refraction, reflection, and dispersion.  I would not have seen the end of this rainbow had it not been for the large number of raindrops between me and the other side of the field, and I was in just the right position relative to the sun to observe it.  This may have been a first in my life, and it was still a completely private event.  I didn’t take any pictures with my cellphone until the rain around me and in the field had stopped almost completely, and by then the end of the rainbow was gone.  The two bows were still such a striking sight that the guy who usually rockets past me in the white BMW 325i station wagon actually slowed way down.  Either that or his wife was admonishing him to be careful near the pedestrian snapping photos.

Once again I was reminded of God’s words to Noah.  I was moved by the beauty, and deeply touched that God had providentially provided me with this unexpected gift.  In my private thoughts I worshipped my Creator.

Not all of my thoughts are so rosy.  Do you ever have times of mental turmoil?

David was unusually gifted in that he not only communicated his thoughts clearly, but also as poems that can be sung.  About half of the psalms are attributed to him, and many reveal that he was a profoundly emotional man, prone to discouragement and mental uneasiness.  He said this:

 “Trust in Him at all times, O people;

pour out your heart before Him;

God is a refuge for us.”

(Psalm 62:8)

Pour out your heart before Him.  Picture this as water gushing out of a pitcher; the meaning is that you should fully express your complaints and desires to God.  One does not do this to inform Him of anything—He already knows what is in our hearts and minds—but sharing our most intimate thoughts with God does demonstrate our dependence on Him, and it also deepens the relationship.  Do you want a deeper relationship with God?

For me this process is intensely private, but as David says, God can be trusted at all times.  And you can do this morning, noon, or night.  Agitated? Anxious? Discouraged? Embarrassed? Fed up? Sad? Stressed out? Upset? Weary? Worried?  Pour out your heart before Him.  If you know God and are willing to accept His ways, then He will comfort you, and the turmoil will evaporate.

Public

Dunkin Donuts are near and dear to my heart, and they were invented in eastern Massachusetts about an hour from where I was born and raised.  Most of their donuts are great, but quite frankly they can’t make a glazed donut to save their lives.  Not even close.  The glazed Krispy Kreme donut is one of the culinary wonders of the southeast.  When you see the neon sign lit up and you smell the odor of fresh Krispy Kremes (as we sometimes call them) you understand why Pavlov’s dogs slobbered so much.  Oh yes, and for 17 years we lived only about a mile from one of these places.

If you’ve never had the opportunity to watch these hot babies coming out of the fryer on the automated assembly line, well, then you’ve missed out on a real treat.  Out they march, line by line, and enter the automated frosting machine.  It’s a mesmerizing sight, broken only by the sound of the growling stomachs reminding you of why you stopped by in the first place.  If you get there at the right time, they’ll pack them up in a box when they are so hot that some of the glazing will run down the sides and form a neat little puddle around each one.  And when you eat them a few minutes later, ohhhhhh, they are soooo smooth, and fantastically sweet. They are unlike any other donut, and fresh warm ones really do melt in your mouth.  The public is welcome here, and oh boy, do they take advantage of it.

The last CT scanner I saw looked just like a giant Krispy Kreme.  I was placed on a table, injected with a contrast agent to enhance the image, and then slowly moved by a motor back and forth in the donut hole.  Once again I listened to the voice telling me when to breathe and when to hold my breath, but at least this time she sounded nice.  X-rays bombarded my abdominal and pelvic regions in order to image the lymph nodes to see if any of them looked abnormal.  This is so much fun that I’m surprised that nobody has put these things at amusement parks.  As a member of the public I interacted with various people before and after the procedure.  On this particular day I arrived at the facility at about 7 am, early enough that shortly before my test one lady was busily restocking various kinds of supplies.  She told me that her job was important, and she illustrated it by telling me that people would come looking for her when they ran out of toilet paper.  I was completely convinced.

Public places and public facilities are those open to all people and are often paid for with public money (a.k.a. tax dollars).  Boston is a charming city and it collects a great deal of public money.  If you ever get there, then I highly recommend that you walk the Freedom Trail.  It weaves its way past sixteen sites of historical significance, and you’ll pass by the Boston Common, which is older than any other public city park in the United States. 

And then there is public recognition.  This year’s Vintage (the BJU yearbook) was dedicated to my good friend Grace Collins Hargis.  Roughly 3,000 people were in attendance, and we briefly fêted her significant academic training and remarkable career.  At the time of this writing she is on a trip to a remote village to help analyze the tribal language, plan an alphabet, and contribute to the development of a program to teach reading and writing.  By the way, she has been teaching on the university level for 53 years.  Outstanding service merits this kind of public commendation; I don’t know if there has ever been a more deserving candidate than she.

Public praise should not be limited to people.  The psalmist David, whom God Himself appraised as a man after His own heart (Acts 13:22), said the following:

“I have not hidden your deliverance within my heart;

I have spoken of your faithfulness and your salvation;

I have not concealed your steadfast love and your faithfulness

from the great congregation.”

(Psalm 40:10)

PET and CT scans done in 2014 showed cancerous lymph nodes sprinkled in multiple places only on my neck and some on my right shoulder.  Here is the current situation:

·       The lymph nodes examined with the Krispy Kreme lymph scans are normal and for now I can continue without treatment.  If you’re unfamiliar with the idea of having cancer and not being treated for it, then you can read my explanation in A Rattle In An Old Car.

·       I’m feeling good.  I’ll continue to be tested a few times each year, but currently I’m doing so well that I don’t need to see my oncologist until November.  Unless I have some symptoms indicating that bad things are happening, I won’t have to have another body scan this year.

·       I had a great school year.  I expected the 2014-15 academic year to be exceptionally difficult, but it was one of the best years I’ve had in quite some time.

God continues to be with me.  In addition to blessing me with a stable physical condition, He has given me spiritual, mental, and emotional strength that has far exceeded my expectations.  He continues to use my circumstances as a tool to instruct me in His ways, and He is also using them in the lives of others.  God and God alone is responsible for keeping me at peace.  He is compassionate and powerful, and He is actively involved in my life on a daily basis.  You don’t get this unless you know God.